Breathless in Arizona

I looked down at my game ticket. Printed on the front was a reminder of how few games we have left this season. Tonight’s game was number 75 meaning after tonight there were just six games remaining this season.

That fact alone was enough for me to let out a huge sigh of disappointment even before thinking about racing Legend Mark Grace having only seven more chances including tonight to finally win a race before the long dark off-season envelopes us.

My mind was racing as I thought back over the past 38 games. I could replay every single loss Grace had suffered. As I thought about it my heart began to race and I began hyperventilating.

I had to stop and remind myself to take a deep breath. If these losses were affecting me so greatly I cannot even imagine what they must be doing to poor Gracie. Still I was confident that Grace would prevail.

With the Diamondbacks finishing their home stand and preparing to embark on the second-to-last road trip of the season the time seemed perfect for Grace to be victorious.

Victory was so close. Just one break and maybe a lucky break and he would be a winner. He has it in him, I just know it.

As the race began I could see the determination in his huge foam eyes. His polyester mouth had a look of pure determination. Clearly the stress of all the losing was not affecting Grace or so I thought.

Just as that thought entered my head I watched in horror as Grace pulled up just outside the Giants on-deck circle grasping his mascot chest. I had seen this before. Shortness of breath, blurred vision, and heaviness of limbs.

Grace was either having an anxiety attack or he had fallen in love with Meg Ryan and failed to remember he was to meet her at the top of the Empire State Building on Valentines Day.

A groan from the crowd was quickly followed by concern for Grace’s health. Poor Grace was helped off the field and into the stands losing yet another Legends race in what can only be described as our hero being “Breathless in Phoenix”.


About Jeff Summers

Just a guy from Section 132 Row 9 Seat 9 trying to understand the metaphysics of baseball and whether the knuckleball defies Newton's first law of motion.
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